How are you Aizeee?

It's been a while since I blogged here. I miss blogging. I don't know why did I stop writing about rants and all. Prolly I'm just not in the mood. Just that.

I've been in a bad mood lately. I'm just so pissed everytime I'm around other people. No one in particular actually. It just suck to death everytime she nags about taking meds and eating right stuffs to eat. Also, trying to act like she's concern about me when all I know is that she was all concern about when is payday and when she would get her money from me. OK. I am talking about her. Yea, I could be the most rude daughter on earth but seriously you'll understand where I am coming from once you get to know her.

Where in the hell you could possibly imagine a sick person would visit a lame guy just to feel she is being loved and cared? OK. Yea, I've done the most stupid thing in the world. Even I know I am chillin' because of fever and having a freagin' dry cough and running nose, I still manage to go there just to see him and let him know what is up with me.. Well honestly, I went there for a fight. Since I am not feeling well and I want to scream like hell because of annoyance, I'd rather go there and argue even he's clueless what's my point. Sorry I have to do it. I just wanna see you, that's the truth.

After seeing tons of messages and missed calls, I replied and he was tottally pissed. He screamed and called it quits. Fine with me. I am all done. (AS IF?)

So, all in all, life's been screwed up. March is about to finish. When could I see beach? Or probably, when could I hear the wedding bells? BOOOOOOOOO!

Not a good start

I missed my inaanak's 3rd Birthday. It was an emergency. Kelly's at the hospital right now. :( I hope he'll get better soon. Ninang Damba's missing you lil boy. :( I'm so sad for Kelly's condition. :(

So I have 2 gifts for Lila now. My gift last Christmas and now my gift for her Bday. Was wondering how will I give her these? Hmmm...

On the side note:
I'm not expecting too much from this new relationship, but yea, I can see some consistency going on. I thought we'll not surpass a week or two of togetherness haha. But now, we're still here.. I don't know. But sure! I'll hang on. Stay calm and be with you as long as you want me to stay. As long as you think we're okay. As long as we think this is going to be fine... I'll stay. :)

I'm missing On*e though. I finally had the guts of visiting him earlier. Oh I mean yesterday. I was too brave to face him. I even told him what's going on with me. :) He asked me why do I need to tell him where infact he doesn't need to know because we're through already.. Well I have so many reasons why I went there...

~ I miss him
~ I want to know what's going on with him
~ I want to ask how was the case
~ I just couldn't hide it, yes! I still love him. DAMN!

You got to be kiddin me

Yesterday I went to my doctor for my ff check up. Had a good and bad news. Well, I'm still completely fine. One thing though, my wallet will get hurt for sure. haha!

So anyway, having the procedures with the nurse, she got my BP, my pulse rate and my current weight. Holidays just passed so I am feeling so fat... I keep on ranting in my twitter account that I think I gained weight. I really feel it since yea, my body's heavier compared before the festives. And to my surprise! WOAH! I only weigh 84lbs. WTF? Srsly?

I didn't go to work today :( I'm feeling dizzy and sleepy. Prolly because of the meds I'm taking. Damn! I shouldn't be drinking booze since I'm in medication. FUDGE! That's what I'm saying! I don't want to see my doctor for I know my social life will get ruined! hahaha! Silly me! Hmmm.. So what am I gonna do now? Well, I don't know, prolly I'll just order calamansi juice tonight at Patrick's Welcome Home Party/Birthday Bash. Oh well, let's see til I post some pics here...

Got to go now and make myself healthy! haha! I'll have a walk outside. Excercise? Come on! Not for me! LOL

PS. Sorry boss, not my intention to be out of the office today. Blame it on my meds! :D

How do you achieve or maintain balance in your life?

I've read this from Daphne's Diary, so I'm blogging about it here. I admit I have a not so balance life and I'm trying my best to have a normal one. Srsly, time is really important to me. Infact, I still need more than 24 hours just to have time for everybody. I mean, I got tons of friends, from highschool, from village, from college, and another set from other batch of scs. Still, I have my family and cousins that I am trying to deal with. And finally, I got my man who needs more than of my time and existence. I admit that work really occupies a lot of my time, but in fairness to me, whenever I know my presence is important for a certain event, I make it a point I am available. Sure I do say "pass" every now and then, I hope my friends would understand where I am coming from. :)

Care to guess what lacks me most? hehe

Here are some memories I got that make me smile:

Just last Sat/Sun, Carla had her Birthday at Parque España, Alabang. Wasn't able to make it that night. I'm srsly having a dry cough and colds. My body's aching but yea, I wanna go there and celebrate. The next day, Oge fetched me and surprised Carla! She wasn't happy am around though, LOL she's a bit tampo. So, since I am guilty, we headed to Stabs ATC and had some coffee. My treat. :) Happy Bday darling! WOW! Look at us, we are definitely all grown ups now! These four ladies I am faking with (haha) for 21 years now I guess, I certainly want to continue my life with them. The real people from day 1 to now. I love them all. That's Orange, Carla, Aiza, Marla, and Khai (shempre madami pa kameng friends, kaso kame ung solid na isang text lang.. dumadating kahit tamang tambay at yosi lang sa bulwagan o sa bahay ni khai/marla/oge)
Just a recap on my weekend, I did sleep a lot last Saturday after I went to my man. Next day, yea, I had a good laugh with my fake friends (LOL) till 530pm. Then, Carla and I attended mass. After, we went to salon for a massage. She went online and fix her fb account in the salon having my laptop. We called Mcdo for a delivery. FYI, Globe Tatoo is good, I mean, it's GREAT! The connection was amazing, I didn't expect it that way, prolly because of the location or something. I don't know. So I went home at 930pm with these colds and cough and had a good night sleep.

That's our last out of town, Oge's bday. I'm sure, I did blog about this before :)

This is my last out of town with college friends, Cagbalete Quezon. I miss them so much, specially Gaze and Gen, whom I always call whenever I need a friend. We're all busy ok? Do not just put the blame on me girls! LOL

Look at this, ang dami namin no? Even the place was not so cool, we end up happy because of kachimoyan. Wala lang, the kwentuhan and all the bonding made the trip better. :) Miss you all. Our next getaway would be on October? Tulio's hometown, Bacolod. YAY!

Just recent, I had a time to bond with them at Gen's birthday. We celebrate it at Central Bar, Mandaluyong and stopped at Center Stage for some sing along trip. I do not have any sleep yet at that time, still I opted to stay with them and chill. I miss you all really. :)

Here's my Deniña clan, we're not complete in that pic ofcourse, but that was our last getaway. We went to Pansol, Laguna. They are trying to call me now since they haven't seen me since then. Jeck, my cousin is going home from Dubai on July. I don't know if time will permit me to have fun with them. I really do hope.
My immediate family, which I don't have a latest pic, LOL I got to see all of them during Sundays. One of my happiest times when Kelly is around. "Lang penta penta Tutiiii!" Hahaha! Should I need to elaborate? hehe

Do I need to explain where I put all my idle time? HEHE Everybody knows how I love this man. Every Saturday, I got to have this real happiness when we bond. All my fears are gone and stress were subsided. Again, he's my paracetamol and I do not want to live my life without him. Not again. :) Last Sat, I brought some food from Mcdo and some sweets from Bancheto. Time is really short. We're still having a good talk about everything when I need to go home, as per the BJMPs :( f*ck them!

So yea, those are the people whom I share my life with. As much as I want to, wanna balance my time and distribute it to all of them, but of course it's impossible because we need to work. Well yea, everyone is busy right now. A lot of my friends are busy with their jobs as well.

So my current set up is like this:

and I wanna do this, but I can't because I don't have leaves LOL:


How about you? How do you achieve or maintain balance in your life?

Yesterday

I couldn't get up from bed. I had this "shutter" thing on my back that hasn't gone until now. I had a massage from the village masseuse, but her hands didn't take off the pain I am suffering. The news said there's a storm coming and because of that, I had a goodnight sleep, that I overslept and forgot I am working in a graveyard shift. Luckily, I still got PTO, so I used it. I am feeling guilty because I had some bugs from the Engineering, and I am actually working on some leads to increase. Meaning I don't have the right to skip work, for I need to work my ass off to reach my goals.

I woke up at around seven, took a bath and turned on my laptop. Checked some mails, and my fb account. While I was playing Restaurant City, I thought of having a massage once again. This time, I want ate from my fave salon nearby. So I went to BDO and withrew some cash, had some fishballs near the bank and the rain started to fall. WTF! I arrived the salon 10am and asked for assistance. Unfortunately, ate wasn't around yet and she'll be in by 11:30 or so. I couldn't wait for her, so I went to the salon in front of the village then.. I was surprised with the ambiance, I didn't expect that salon was that big, and classy, and relaxing. It was cozy that I almost dreamt of having one someday haha! I asked for a body massage and the front desk officer said, the masseuse isn't around. DAMN! So, to make myself a lil happy in a way, I tried their footspa plus pedicure plus back massage for 250 and it was damn good. I went home and ate my lunch, went back to my laptop to finish work from my sideline. After which, I played Desperate Housewives, season 5, watched 1 episode only then I went back to sleep. I alarmed my phone at 8pm, but I started fixing myself at 9pm.

Meanwhile I arrived office a 10:44pm having salompas at my back. I am still feeling sick, but I need to work or I'll be kicked out from here. LOL Seriously, I dont' have any plans of taking the day off yesterday, but I really have to, for my back is killing me and I don't really know what the hell was the cause. Was it over work? Should I give up my sideline or what? I just can't man. I signed a contract just to remind everyone. :(

I still feel sick. :(
Babe, come home and take care of me..
I wish you could.

Ang Sarap ng Weekend

Kaso, sabay monday shift....
BULILYASO
BUSTED
CHIMOI
KABAOG

ano pa?
A friend once told me, life would not be perfect all at once. Say, your career is good then your love life would be shit. I totally agree with that. There's no such thing as perfect, but come on! How in the f'n world I get to have life such this? busted career, shitty love life, and now, zero social life! YOU GOTTA BE KIDDIN ME MAN! *sigh*

I know I am not a good person to bless with all those good things in life, but hey! I am not that evil to suffer all these. I am feeling helpless. STRESSED. I want a normal life. A normal life with Onie would be enough. KAHIT PANG GABI PA! But since, I can not have it. Ung normal na shift nalang sana, wag manlang ipagkaila saken.. I'm seriously desperate now. I wanna sleep all day, all night, please do not wake me up. :(

intellicare sucks!

I left the office yesterday late but early. Late for my shift that is 930-630 supposedly. Apparently, I logged out at 8 something. Was really not feeling too well. I am now afraid of eating chicken or anything na "malansa" including eggs. Oh-oh! How would I live without eggs? In my everyday living, I got to have at least one egg in a meal. Anyways, I've been allergic to too much of chicken way back when I was a kid. But, what happened to me today was unusual, for the normal thing was I am having freakin rashes on the upper left arm and on the upper right thighs. That's the usual for me when I eat too much of chicken! What happened today was totally disgusting! My body turned reddish and somewhat rashes were all over. Gosh! Was feeling really sick, not to mention my running nose and a slight fever. so at 3pm I woke up. I opt to go to the hospital and see a doctor and ask what's going on with me.

I chose this nearby hospital and hurriedly ask if its ok for them to check me up even I only have the number of intellicare not the card. Reason why I got no card was I resigned here and I surrendered all the benefit cards we have from work. So, the nurse stood up and called intellicare for verification.

After gazillion of calls, she ended telling me they couldn't admit me for my card was terminated! holy crap! would this guy from the intellicare knew how much I am suffering at that time? I was bloody red and I couldn't ease the itchiness. I told the nurse that the number I gave was a new number. Yes I resigned and I came back but the number I gave was totally different from the old one.

I tried calling shellie (our HR) about it. Then, she made an action. Texted me to wait for a sec and the intellicare guy will call the hospital and tell them that I am able to use that number and I should be admitted anytime.

See how unreliable that guy was? He didn't return the call for the next 30 mins or so. I was dead sick and tired of what I'm feeling so I asked shellie for the number. I called. He didn't picked up the phone the 3rd time. Arg! so, he answered then, and apologize and handed the phone to the nurse. They agreed on admitting me. Thank good God!

After 2 patients, I was called. You see, the doctor checked me up for only 15 mins I guess. He gave me prescription, medicine to buy and ask me to stop from eating yeah! undesirable food for me which are chicken, fish, eggs, and the like for one week. *sob*

I'll be in medication for 1 week and I will see what will happen next.

Today, my head is bloody aching and I still got running nose. I headed to the nurse here in the office after I took my meal and ask for bioflu. I took 3 tablets of medicines (which I hardly do whenever I am sick) and silently work here in my place. I don't want to take an off even am not feeling good because I am not stayong in my real home. I honestly want to go home in Alabang, but I still have tons of work to do here.

So now, I'm signing off and will back to work. *sniff sniff*

allergies attack me. sigh

My weekend wasn't fun. I am having allergies since Friday for eating too much of chicken. And I gain weight fyi. Am fatter than usual. LOL :)) can you imagine that?

Onie said.

"hala! ang lapad mo lang?"

Madamme irritably replied.

"so, hiwalay na tayo? maarte ka."

LOL :))

I finished watching desperate housewives season 1 last weekend and started season 2 after. I can't wait for weekend to watch it. I am soo loving it. See how boring my life lately? Been into dvds. I don't have plans for party even some of my hs friends are asking me to go out. I'm not in the mood. I don't know. Because of these fucking allegies. damn it! I wanna get rid of this. I do hope they'll ask me out this weekend again. Seems that I need a break! A long break?

*Darn