Could I be fallin for you?

I'm done with some emails and already did an important report today. Sent to my boss as well :) Goodjob for me. My mind is still wrecked and my head is fuckin spinning. I really need some sleep though. So what I did was to check out our hot nurse from the clinic and ask if I could stay for an hour or 2. YES! I did get a rest for just an hour. Now, I'm trying to contemplate what to do. My sleep was bitin and the food I asked Aisa to buy for me from greenwich sucks to death! Why the fuck the branch of greenwich here in Ortigas is like that? Weird and such a waste! Baked Macaroni is always been my fave order from this chain, hence, I always forgot that this fastfood branch here doesn't give a rewarding services compared to what we have in our town. Oh well! I'm starving so I need to fill some food in my stomach so I could be kind of useful here. haha

Just recently, I'm hooked with this some dude. I didn't expect this shits to happen this soon. I don't know if we are going beyond our limitations but what the f, we're having the best time of our lives. Don't just the world give this moment to me for once? I've been battling for someone before for the fuckin longest time. I did everything for the sake of love. Nothing happened. Like zero updates. So I was thinking, yea, it could be because it's not for me. He can always be a part of my past. The past that made me stronger now. The past that taught me tons of lessons. The past that was been a wonderful 9 years of my life. I don't want to regret anything from it actually. And I'm not this 100% sure that it's already done. Yes! technically, we're done. We're through. But there are a lot of things we need to talk about, that is when you are free. So as I always tell you.. Once you're free, look for me. Let's talk. And decide what to do next. I won't promise anything beautiful now. What could I just say is... Be brave, face the reality. You've come this far. I know, somehow, God will grant our wish. Now, I still want you to know, my ultimate wish is for you to be free. Still my number 1 prayer and you can count on me with that buddy! :)

A big smile for this some dude. Good morning sweetie :) I know you're still snoozing and enjoying my hot pink sheets in your bed. I have thousand words to say right now. LIke what I said, you're not giving me an idle time to think, to reminisce every single moment we are sharing. You always see to it that we're together having this cloud nine feeling. First of, I want to thank you. Thank you for putting back the smile in my face. The real smile that was gone 3 years ago. I didn't plan anything like this... But you surprisingly came and give the best out of me. I told you so many things you change about me since the day 1 we started. And I didn't expected things to be like the way it is now. Everything was quick. Everything was amazing. Everything seems to be perfect. Now I know what the hell you were talking earlier, na natakot ka bigla. Natakot ka for a moment na baka bigla nalang ako matauhan. I can't react on that now. Give me some time to think. This came from you. And I had goosebumbs when you said this.. "Meron tayong habambuhay para patunayan sa isa't isa kung ano tong nararamdaman natin. relax. ienjoy natin bawat oras na magkasama tayo. Ang mahalaga kung ano nararaamdaman natin ngayon." -- MISMO! OO nga naman. Tama sya. Kaya chillax. I'll sit back, and enjoy this one hell of a ride. :)

I couldn't help but spill my lil secret with you. I see him in you. You are actually a walking clone of the man I used to love. You talk like him. You dress like him. You act just like him. Your dialogues were exactly the same. You were making me insane! The fuck with my past. It's fuckin haunting me! Everywhere I go I can see or hear such... how do you fuckin call that?? premonition could be? LOL Whatever you godamn call it! But yea, I hear Chito Miranda everywhere, ex's been texting and askin why the fuck I dont have time seeing him. What's up with me? and why the fuck I don't have any text or whatsoever?

To tell you the truth... I wanna scream like hell! I wanna curse this goddamn situation why the fuck it's playing around with me? Can I just be happy for once not thinking of anyone else around me? Just me. Ako lang. Walang iba. This is not being selfish man... All my life, I gave myself to the one I love but I didn't get anything worth it in return. What I got were the stress and shits which I actually embraced and tried to fix once in a while.

Now what I hope is to give me some time to relax. Give me some time to cherish this new chapter of my life.. A lot from my friends were crazy to hear stories about this some dude. And I'm excited to introduce him in time. Sat isn't a best time mga chong. We could have re-sched it and I tell you it'll be worth the wait. :)

4 days isn't enough for me to know and be concrete with my decision. But you made it easier for me to think of what to do. You didn't force me at all. You gave me all the time to choose whatever path I need to cross this time. You weren't selfish and that is love. You weren't arrogant even I always compliment you. YOU HAD ME WITH THOSE SMILES. YOU HAD ME WITH THOSE UNLIMITED KISSES. YOU HAD ME WITH THOSE TIGHT HUGS. I couldn't forget the perfect feeling when I'm with you. I don't want to go anywhere else but beside you. I feel so secured. I feel loved. I feel you so much. You were incredibly a gift from above. I must say. I don't know. But if this shit doesn't work out, let me tell you this.. No bola. walang halong charing.. Those 4 days made me a real person again. No kiddin. Sobrang saya na hindi ko mabibili kung san man. Before Friday came, I was feeling fucked up because of my canceled Hongkong trip. Now I realized, hah! What happened for 4 days were certainly uncomparable to any vacation I could ever gone through. Now, let's try this... Come, be with me. Let's share this ride together... :) Missing you bunch!

PS. I promise I'll work tomorrow like hell. Come on! I don't have sleep yet. Tomorrow babawi ako. Pati ikaw igogoodjob moko! :) Good morning again! :)