weekend drama

today, i kinda feel again the feeling of being "not-connected-to-anyone"haaay.. this is freakin' lonely. im sad. really sad.

wala ng natuloy na binalak
that's the fuckin' saddest part here. I almost wanted to SCREEAAAAMMM! (btw, yea.. for those who prayed for this cancellation of our beach getaway, you better get lost and try to find the exit door coz i really wanna chop your head.. you're bloody getting into my nerves!)

last thursday shift, i intended to hit all my tasks for i will ask permission to take an off on my friday shift. I'll be miles away from manila. get tanned at the beach with my so-called friends from college. so i packed my things up and ready to go. I arrived Alabang then, grabbing some cash from the atm machine, Gen texted. We have to cancel our trip. may bagyo raw! fukc that! nakakainis! if you just know how excited i am with this trip. maaawa talaga kayo saken. huhuhu. I've been looking forward to this event pero ayun. dahil sa punyetang bagyo! nagkanda leche leche! haaaaay. oh well. shit happens, that's the least i could say to calm down myself.

Gen told me to go back to ortigas/makati area so we could chill nalang somewhere there. I don't have the means of staying there with that black clouds and heavy rain. I don't wanna piss myself off because of the weather. I'd rather stay cool with whoelse? Onie nalang. I stayed at home for 2 hours with my folks and manage to fix myself and be ready to surprise hubby. He doesn't know anything about this so-called crap... the cancellation going on thingy, so might as well, take this opporunity to be with him nalang. so un, i went there, seeing his big smile on his face made my day complete. really, onie's been my paracetamol since then. He can make me cool down and take away my angst and my head ache all at the same time without doing something or just smiling back at me. just that.. i know.. it's kinda cheesy but for real.. i mean that. ;) he really is my medicine for all the fuckin' head aches i've been encountering.

I stayed there until 5am. (ok. for those who are protesting.. take the exit door pls. LOL) I know it's too much to stay there until that time, but i wanted to. That's the only time I could bond with him, that's the only time i could see him happy, that's the only time we could say goodnight with each other face to face, that's the only time i could touch him, that's the only time i can embrace him... i could still remember the lines i told him that night..

"i don't want to sleep even i am sleepless, i just wanna see your entire face looking at me.. I love you so much. Though we are dealing with this kind of situation, i am still here, I'll be yours forever hubby. Stay with me... I miss you dearly.."

Sigh... i miss him again now. if only the time permits me to stay there longer.. I will. Yes! truly I'll stay...