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If you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best. - Marilyn Monroe -- LOVES!

It's all because of you

I didn't expect I'll be able to relate with this song now. It's just that, I don't wanna feel it this way.. I really really don't want everything will turn out like that. Funny I've been battling with my feelings recently. It's just so hard. I'm not liking it. I swear!

Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again
But you broke me, now I can't feel anything
(grabe naman sumakto to..)

When I love you and so untrue
I can't even convince myself
When I'm speaking it's the voice of someone else


Oh, it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay
(dito pumerfect e)

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?
:'<

Oh, what are we doing?
We are turning into dust
Playing house in the ruins of us

Running back through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When it's too late, too late
(wag naman sana, still there's hope in me..kahit onte meron pa)

Oh, it tears me up
I tried to hold on but it hurts too much
I tried to forgive but it's not enough
To make it all okay

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
How can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?

But we're running through the fire
When there's nothing left to say
It's like chasing the very last train
When we both know it's too late, too late

You can't play our broken strings
You can't feel anything
That your heart don't want to feel
I can't tell you something that ain't real

Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse
So how can I give anymore
When I love you a little less than before?
Oh, you know that I love you a little less than before

Let me hold you for the last time
It's the last chance to feel again

Bilisan mo na kase, malapit ko ng maramdaman to ng buong buo.. im really getting there.. :(

gusto ko na....

magkajowaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! :(

Steady Down South

I know a lot of people think living in South is kind of a no-no thing for professionals, or even to commoners, or whoever. I mean, a lot from my friends hate it. Yea, I understand them why. Hello? The freakin' traffic you'll encounter every single day, the toll fee, the shortage of water (uhuh) and the uber layo from the city! Yes! I know what you all think about our humble place.. But what can I do? I love it in here. I love South even I know I almost lost my job for being late every single day at work. I love South even I have to deal with the traffic during days and nights. I love South even all of my friends from college are living in North. I just love South that I had to go back in there for the nth time after trying to settle in different flats in the North. I tried living with my relatives from Rosario Pasig twice, I had rented a condo in Greenhills, I rented an apartment with friends somewhere in Ortigas Extension (Sorry, I forgot the name of the village). Yea, even I felt the comfort of travelling going to the office, I still opted to stay at the South. As for the reasons? I got tons! :)

... And here they go: I had my family there. It's quite hard being independent. I couldn't seem to eat alone. I was too lazy to fix everything for myself. Hahaha! OK. YES! I AM LAZY. Period. I can't stand the fact that no one's answering me whenever I'm ranting. I can't smoke alone. LOL I've been punishing my purse for shopping tons because of boredom. Hahaha! I couldn't seem to save moolah when I'm far from home. Lastly, I can't chill with my old friends. YES! A lot from my highschool buddies are still living with their 'rents. So whenever they text me before, I couldn't say yes right away since I'm living far from them. Sooo, I opted to go back in our old town. Dirty soouth :)

If you'll just experience living in there. You'll see for yourself how lovely it is living in down south. We also got a mini greenbelt there, called Alabang Town Center. Libis or Makati where you can find tons of bars and spots for drinks and whatevers, you can rely in BF, somewhere in Aguirre St. I'm telling you, you'll love it in there. Really cheap drinks and yummy foods. Malls are tons as well, from Festival Supermall (well it's as big as Megamall I think), to Starmall (goods are cheap as St. Francis'), ATC (again, a greenbelt-like), and we got SM too (Muntinlupa, Sucat, Bicutan, Las Pinas). Did I ever mention how steady it is in there feeling the cozy breeze of the provice-like air? Come on! Yea! And the fact that it is far from the city, I mean all the cars from edsa, all the busy people in Makati and North Edsa. Once you're in South, you'll kinda like the steady atmosphere. The laid-back living.

YES! I super love South. :)

So, while I was enjoying my long weekend alone, I realized how lucky I am living in down south.

What were you up to?

Wow long weekend was over! It was a good one though. Not too exciting, not even drastic or something. It was just so-so. Plainly a time for myself, no one but me.

After shift last Saturday morning, I went to visit my man. We had a lil argument but still we ended it fine indeed. I bought some The Bar, Sprite, and Marlboro Lights from Mightee Mart after which and went home to take a bath. I'm going to Oge's crib to chill with my highschool friends. It's raining cats and dogs, a perfect time to share stories with your best buds in town. I just miss having a nice laugh with them. Carla ordered 2 boxes of pizza. Via left at 12mn and 4 of us, Oge, Marla, Carla and I called it a night at 2am. Kai went to some party that night that's why she can't be with us. Too bad.

The next day, Kelly and his family arrived. So, I didn't made any plans of leaving. I stayed home with all my pamangkin and we enjoyed eating, watching and chatting together. Came 4pm they have to leave while Totee and I attended mass in the evening. We ended the night as we watched The Final Destination 4 in a last full show at Festival Mall. The next day, Monday, was a holiday, thank good God! I finally had a time to pamper myself. I woke up late and had a brunch. Took a bath and went out. I headed to SM Muntinlupa for some Facial and Waxing at Flawless. Meanwhile, I went to the supermarket for some grocery. Bought cake at Goldilocks for my dear pamangkin. Headed to Maricar and Michelle's Salon for some footspa, mani, and pedi. What a good day indeed :) Talking bout pampering! :) At home, I opened the plastic bags I bought. I made some popcorns, opened the chocolate cake, some chips, and sodas. I la-la-love merienda! I then went out to the nearby tailorshop to get my dress which I will wear tom for the wedding. Totee and I stopped over in the store, where some friends were there to smoke. HAH! It's raining so it was kinda weird for me to see them chilling in the store. Parang hello, rain or shine? makatambay lang? Haha! It was actually a cozy night. I found myself with a fleece in pambahay outfit enjoying all the "kapamilya" telenovelas. Oh I wish I'm working in a normal shift, so I could watch everything at night, haha :).

I got up not so early a while ago, kind of confuse if I'll visit my man again, but prefered to stay home and rest. Carla stopped by, she gave a project which I need to work on til Friday. I was online since morning while I harvest and play Poke Buddy in FB. Meanwhile, I continue to watch Gossip Girl and yes, I finally finished the season 2. It was all good, I felt a lil bit kilig, OK i was really kilig with all the cast. I can't wait for season 3. I took a bath and went to the mall with Totee. Now I'm here in the office and actually not planning to work. LOL Kidding!

Since I finished my coffee and I'm finally done with this post, I guess, I need to start on a new one. :) LOL or rather yea, start on my tasks. hahahah!

How bout you? How's your loong weekend? Did you have fun?

I need this

How do I you call it? A cap? Hat? hair dresser? I dunno, but yes, I need it to finish my attire on Sept 9. I don't need any fancy stuff, I do hope it's affordable coz I'm going to use it only once. :)

Spotted

Guess where I am...

Carla ordered, Beef Pepper Rice. Looks delicious!

This is what I ordered, Chicken Pepper Rice. It was heaven! YUM!

...and yea, I ate at Pepper Lunch Alabang Town Center, it was indeed a must try! Visit them now at 2nd floor, beside Cibo.

So I didn't visit my man last Sat, I need to rest and I need to shop for an evening dress. After shift, I went straight home, changed clothes and headed to ATC together with my friend, Carla. We actually planned several thigs to do. We need to have a massage, foot spa, watch UP, have lunch, shop stuffs, and grab some coffee at Starbs to have some chit chat.

But, time is so short, so we ended going to Rustans first, then went to 5th Ave, and there I fell in love with the red HOT tube dress. I'm so excited to fit it, the next thing I knew, I was paying for two lovely dress! LOL yeah, I need to buy the other one, or I might not able to sleep that night. Carla, got the perfect jumpsuit! OMGEEE, it's super nice, I also want a pair, but it doesn't fit me, ya know, I'm the smallest creature on earth.. LOL I also got a nice necklace. It's super fab. She bought a black peep toe stilletos and a chanel like grayish bag. Yea, yea, we are so into shopping, and gossiping, and laughing. hahaha. It was a wonderful day, I swear. I'm so happy with all the stuffs I bought. We headed to Pepper Lunch then to experience their food. And yes!!! Chuvaness.com, I'm impressed! PERFECT! :) We started the kwentos there, and we knew it'll be bitin if we'll see a movie, so we opted to grab some tea, and frappe at Starbs and continue the chatting.

Carla's my fave chat buddy, we never had an idle moment. LOL We had the best night and we ended it after she bought some goods at Breadtalk as a pasalubong for her mom.

I reached home at last, and showed my sisters the stuffs I bought. Meanwhile, KM, Raf, and my boyf's dad arrived. Km invited me to Tj's bday bash. Sarah actually texted me but I didn't reply. I can't say no to KM so I obliged. I just changed top, and we headed to Tj's crib.

Everyone was there, and yes.. I had fun fun Saturday night. :)







I know I look so haggard in all the pics.. hey, I had no sleep yet, I was more than 24 hours awake again at that time. So forgive me with the yucky pics. LOL

Good morning sunshine!

6am, my eyes were wide. I can not sleep anymore. I jumped out my bed and hurridly get something to bite. Meanwhile, I've decided to make some breakfast for him. 4 jumbo hotdogs, 1/4 tocino, and 3 scrambled eggs. YES! I am going to visit him.

He was surprised when he saw me earlier. :) Hah! He was soo haggard and I know for sure, he just got from a lil sleep. My man's like me, he's awake during nights and opt to sleep in days. :) He should've applied for call center before. HAH! So yea, I greeted him GOOD MORNING, and finally I got a goodmorning back. :) He can't even ask why the hell am around, he just keep on staring at me until his room was fixed. So we went up. I gave him my simple pasalubong and he smiled. Sabi ko, wala tayong bonggang food today.. Ako nagluto nyan, pagchagaan mo! hehehhe. We shared our breakfast.

A simple breakfast turned into special when you share it with your loved one.

I didn't go to work last night. I was feeling down right? I opt to rest and got a lot of sleeeep. It wasn't my plan to visit him actually, I just couldn't resist seeing him when I'm feeling blue. So 12nn, I went out and back home. It was kinda bitin. But my morning was all worth it.

I miss you babe, yes... It's your birthday tomorrow. I hope I won't miss it. :) I love you! :)

walang title

Birthday mo na pala sa Thursday.. Tama ba? sa Thursday nga ba? OO sa Thursday nga. Na hindi ko alam kung icecelebrate natin o ano? Magleleave bako? Kelangan mo pa ba ako? Nalulugkot ka rin ba ng todo. Madalas daw akong magsalita habang natutulog, sabi ng utol ko.. Di ko alam ang ibig sabihin nun, pero ayun.. Pakiramdam ko, dahil to sa pagulila ko sayo. Ang tagal na kitang hinihintay.. Araw araw nalang ako nag
gogoodmorning at naggogoodnight sa hangin at kawalan, wala namang naggogoodnight back. Ayokong isipin, masasanay din ako ng bongga, kase ayokong masanay sa kalungkutan. Ilang birthdays pa nga ba? Ilang okasyon pa na wala ka? Miss na miss na kita.

Mukang uulan ng malakas, malakas ung kulog e. Nadadama ko rin sa init ng paligid. Uulan nga siguro. Dinadagdagan pa ng panahon ang lungkot ko. malapit na ang Thursday. Nakakainis, nakakuha ako ng notification from friendster na malapit na nga daw bday mo. Kung alam lang nila na ayoko na munang maalala yan. May iilang kaibigan mo ang nagtetext na saken. Happy bday daw. ano daw plano ko? Sa totoo lang. Naubos na ata ang kasweetan ko. wala akong maisip sa ngayon, kase alam ko na kahit ikaw ayaw mo ng icelebrate ang araw na yan. Hindi ko alam kung anong emosyon ang dapat maramdaman. pero i feel so down. really really down.

Magbibirthday ka nanaman. Magbillirads manlang sana tayo no? o kaya magcelebrate sa hotel ng tayong dalawa lang. Ang sweet. Ang romantic. Kung pwede nga sana, magbora tayo. Gusto kong bumalik ng bora, pero sana ikaw na ang kasama ko.. Mga 2 linggo. Solb na solb nako.

Kung alam lang ng tadhana, kung gaano ako kasabik sayo. Kung alam lang ng tadhana, kung gano ako nangungulila sayo.. Kung kaya ko lang ipaalam o isigaw kung gaano ako nahihirapan o nasasaktan dahil wala ka. Siguro maaawa ang tadhana at ibabalik ka saken. Pero hindi ganon kadali ang buhay.. Hindi pwedeng isang sigaw lang, anjan na gusto mo. Hindi to resto na para bang isang order, ilang minuto, ayan na ung pagkaing hiniling mo.. kung mabibili ko lang ang lahat. Kung mabibili ko ang kaligayahan, kung mabibili ko ang batas, kung mabibili ko ang tadhana... Gagawin ko ang lahat, mapagipunan lang yan..

Babalik nako sapagkaidle ko next week. Masaya na malungkot. pero isa lang ang alam ko.. Makakatulog nako (or hindi paren). Pero sana sa pagtulog ko, kasama na kita sa tabi ko..

Miss na miss na kita..
Bisitahin mo naman ako dito.. (or baka sige ako nalang bibista sayo)

I got a PIE for ya..

Eto naman ay base lang sa malikot kong paguutak, charing lang to. hahaha. Natatamad kase ako sa panahon. Sobrang lakas ng ulan ang sarap matulog. Spotan nyo hehehe.








Gusto ko sanang gawan ng pie, lahat ng taong kilala ko. kaso natamad ako bigla. OK pinakamakulay na kay totee! Winner ka!